Tuesday, May 16, 2006

May 16 - Story

By Justin C.


Tony’s faint call into the cold, empty space was never heard. The blank walls, chipped and weathered, stared back at him. His lonely voice echoed for only a moment inside that empty room until it was swallowed up by the darkness.

He was alone. He just figured his friends were played a trick on him like they sometimes did, but something was different this time. Tony had arrived at the abandoned house a little late this evening. Normally him and his friends would hang out in the aged house and try to frighten each other. Tonight, however, Tony was late. His Dad was lecturing him again; telling him how much of a disappointment he is to his father how much better his life should have been. Tony knew not to listen. His father spent too much time at the office to understand anything of his family.

When he had climbed over the rusty gate just ten minutes ago, he saw the usual light in the kitchen. A candle was always burning in the window when a get together was occurring. It signaled to the teens someone was inside the house. The thought of entering it alone would frighten any of the adolescents, especially after sharing so many horror tales within its moldy walls. However, Tony was never scared to go in first and light the candle. Ten years in the Boy Scouts served him well. He was used to being in a tent, alone, out in the wilderness.

So, tonight, with the candle in plain view in the kitchen window, Tony did not think twice before entering. He knew he’d find his friends sitting on the floor in the kitchen, leaning against the rotting, turn of the century cabinets talking. Sometimes at their meetings they would reflect on the goings on of that day, commenting on someone at school or a grade they received in history class. Most nights though, were spent exchanging scary tales. Tony knew his fair share of good horror stories from camping with the Boy Scouts, so he was a favorite for an evening thriller.

Now, after entering through the house’s side door just minutes before, he was standing in complete darkness. When he had walked into the long kitchen earlier, he saw no one. He took a few steps forward, peering into the house’s living room. Cob webs and dust covered every inch of the seating area. An old chandelier hung from the ceiling, its hanging crystal decorations shaded with soot, unable to reflect even the most minute bit of light. Long red drapes hung from the ominous windows. Five windows lined the west wall. Opposite of that, the eastern wall housed the large brick fireplace. The fireplace still contained a few burnt logs from when the house was once occupied. Tony turned around and paced back into the kitchen. He took a seat against the wall, facing the old, chipped cabinets and earthy farm sink.

Suddenly, his head perked up for he had just heard a noise. With just a single candle burning in the kitchen, it was difficult to tell where the sound had come from. At first, he believed the noise to be footsteps, but it was far too light of a sound for that. Again he heard it. Tony could comprehend it was coming from the living room, but he couldn’t see into the wide room enough to make out the source of the sound.

He wasn’t scared. This type of thing happened all the time here. Pranks were played on all his friends on countless occasions. The house itself scared most of the teens so much that even a little squeak would scare them. For Tony, this was not scary. He was almost one hundred percent positive he would find his friend Jake or Greg, hiding behind one the couches in the living room.

He felt his way into the dark room. The candle in the kitchen was too far away now to have any effect. Tony relied on his eyes and knowledge of the room to navigate his way towards the middle.

Step, step, after small step, he edged his way into the center of the living room. He turned around and stared at the five massive colonial windows towering over him. He felt for a second as if they were watching him, but just then the noise he had heard earlier rung out within that room. That sound was echoing through the darkness from right behind him, right next to the fireplace.

As he turned around, he already had a smile on his face, knowing the prank was up, but that expression soon faded.

The light from the five windows shown onto a figure, hunched over in front of the fireplace. The person was cloaked in black. His eyes adjusting a bit, he could make out a head of ice-white hair. It was long and somewhat curled. The figure was a woman.

Tony’s heart began to beat, sweat starting to form on his forehead. He had never been scared before. Lots of questions were running through his head, “Who is this? What’s she doing? Where are my friends?”

An arm reached out into the night, the woman’s hand emerged from inside the cloak and grasped a cane. It was wooden and curved slightly at the top. Most of the person’s weight had to be on this cane for she was leaning to her left considerably. Slowly, she began to turn. She limped around herself, using her cane with each step. Each time she would lift up her can and place it back down, a small “thud” would echo through the room. This was the noise Tony was hearing earlier.

He stood there frightened. He wanted to run, but his muscles were frozen. He was scared for his life, never had he felt like this before.

Tony watched as the moonlight enveloped the woman’s face as she turned. A pale white face was revealed. She was old, and wrinkles lined her face going in every direction. Both of her eyes were closed. She did not say a word for her mouth was sewn shut. Tony gasped. Her eyes sprang open as the moonlight struck her entire face. The large center portion of her eyes were bright blue, encased by a sea of black around them. She had no eyelashes or eyebrows.

The most hideous woman Tony had ever seen was standing right in front of him and staring deep into his eyes.

She started to limp towards him, moaning. He couldn’t move. The old floorboards rattled with each step she took, but other than that, no sound existed in that room. All Tony heard was a moan and all he could see were the blue eyes, burning in the darkness, getting bigger with each step.

Just then a bolt of lightning struck, the entire room was lit up. Tony about fainted. Everyone of his friends were sitting on the couches inside that living room, staring at him. Each of their mouths were sewn shut and they eyes burnt blue. They were like statues.

As the last hint of light was swallowed up by the darkness, the room lay quiet. He was alone once again in the black. He began to hear the limping woman getting closer to him and her moaning.

Suddenly, the noise stopped.

There was silence in that room for almost ten complete seconds - it felt like an eternity to Tony. Then, the tiny kitchen candle extinguished itself.

Tony stood ridged in a completely still, lifeless atmosphere. He was alone.




Then he saw them.

Tens of dozens of bright blue eyes staring at him in the darkness. He felt as if they were looking down into his soul, examining each memory of his life. Countless sets of blue eyes flooded the room, much more than just his friends.

Soon, the old woman’s moaning continued and the small thuds got louder against the floor. The other occupants of the room began to chant and let out screams, piercing into the night.

The living room went silent once more.

Tony felt a cold, crusty, wrinkled hand grab his arm.

It was over.

All he felt was a dull needle being forced through his lip as he fell to the floor, draped in blue.


NaiveMelody6 said...

Great job Justin!

Really well-written and creepy.

The only way I think it could be better is if you had one or two flashbacks before the freaky end part linking the thread and the blue eyes to some memory or dream. I dunno, impact might be greater if you did that.

noxious said...

I do really like that story. But there's something more.. personal about reading a story someone wrote in that person's own handwriting.

And I'm proud to say that the needle part in your story influenced a little scene in the story I'm working on now.

Carolyn V said...

Holy moly Justin! I couldn't stop reading that!!! It was good & creepy! I'm jealous of your writing ability.

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